Aren't holiday weekends so much fun? Hardy, har har. A lot of expectations... and whose expectations?
Let's take a vote as to what percentage of Dads do you think were happy this past Sunday? Please don't take me as the Grinch of Father's Day but rather the 'realist' of expectations.
There are traditions we come with to a relationship/instill in our offspring/create those traditions to be what we think they should be. And since I was raised as a pleaser, it truly was a godsend living with a guy who didn't have expectations regarding holidays including birthdays. To be honest, I had plenty for both of us.
Natureman preferred a recreational day spent bike riding, canoeing and having a nice dinner either homemade/ in a restaurant. But that was an excuse to be able to do those things. Yet, when it was Father's Day, my thought was his kids should put in the effort to include him in their day.
And you know what ?
The man wouldn't wait at home for those calls because preplanning is not necessarily on their radar... They were grown but one spent Father's Day with another family who went camping and preplanning definitely wasn't the other's forte. It may have bothered me, but I never voiced it and seriously, it didn't bother Natureman. He was secure in his role as their Dad. He would say, " I know they love me."
Wow. Alien to this gal who was not raised in a household with an unconditional love. I'm just saying that's how it was/is and I wasn't sure what was going to happen with Father's Day yesterday, to be perfectly honest, as my Dad hadn't been up to snuff all week. It just wasn't wise to go out, so the party went to Dad.
En route to my Dad's a text come thru and it was from my Dad's aide who wanted to give us the heads up, "My Dad didn't want that sweet potato, he wanted to go to an Italian restaurant and it was his day." Well, my brother had already picked up Dad's favorite Outback dish, the coconut shrimp, and I was in the car bringing the party food for the rest of us, carrot sticks, cukes, smoked turkey rollups, blueberries and grapes along with the 'coup de gras' the dessert, a watermelon dressed up as a very specific fish.
When he saw the fish, he was quite taken aback. I asked him if he knew what kind of fish it was. "No" he quipped, I said, "Dad you don't recognize the Flipp'nem fish?"
A huge smile covered his face as this joke was one he had told us and everyone else, a gazillion times. "Do you remember what is so special about the flipp'nem fish?" "Oh yes," he retorted "a flipp'nem fish swims backward to keep the water out of his eyes. " We all cracked up and it turns out my Dad never mentioned once that he preferred to be at the Italian Restaurant. So much for expectations, eh?
Hope you and yours are able to enjoy whatever day it is being together.
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