MIDWEEK MUSINGS: MOMENTOS

My Mom's birthday was yesterday and she would have been 93. She was an avid reader.  Childhood memories include weekly visits to the old downtown public library after which we all would return with our school bags full of new books.

As many of you know reading has not been high on my desires since Irv's passing. Apparently this is not an uncommon occurence having to do with a wandering mind and short attention span. But yesterday I read an entire book in a sitting titled  Gone from My Sight, The Dying Experience.  

Actually, this is a booklet provided by Hospice and was only 7 pages long. Each page spoke volumes. You see during the last 3 months our 98-year-old Dad who was sharp as a tack began to know his body was betraying him. As an anatomy professor, he knew the story...

Dad's interest in TV waned and he began to want to stay in bed more. We had to learn to give him agency making the few decisions where he could still have control. 

We knew our Dad wasn't the same Dad when he didn't feel like company. This withdrawal and limited conversation placed emphasis on inward conversations with past memories more than with those around him.

Disorientation and physical changes are occurring with closed eyes, lack of appetite with petered strength.  He's been on oxygen going on for ~3 weeks. His color has become sallow and he looks all of his 98 years. 

The last couple of days he had a surge of energy with open clear eyes and conversation but the Hospice nurse warned us that was a rally and as the booklet indicated possibly days or hours left. 

Everybody's path is different. But here's what I would ask of you, my dear friends and readers knowing you to be concerned individuals, PLEASE don't ask me how he is. He's a tough bird as my Mom would attest. Our goal now is to keep him comfortable. 

"Death comes in its own time, in its own way and is as unique as the individual who is experiencing it." 

                                   Time passes like the arrow.