A Blessing on Your Head , Mazel Tov, Mazel Tov…

This past Sunday Natureman and I had the pleasure of attending his eldest niece’s special Jewish wedding in Chicago.  What made this wedding so ‘special’ is that this was an arranged marriage. The couple had only met twice before the engagement and only two months lapsed between the engagement and the wedding.  In the olden days arranged marriages weren’t so unusual but in today’s world, it is not so common. We could look at it as speed dating with an arranged introduction.  Yet, there’s no dating to date.  Each knows  history about the individual and their family.  They also know they want to get married and marry someone with the same religious values and  traditions.  In this case,  fundamental Judaism, Chabad, a Hasidic sect. The individuals of course can decide that it’s not a good match and that’s that.  It is not a shotgun wedding. Obviously these two decided that they were a good match…

The wedding day was a long one as guests are invited to attend various ceremonies where they are segregated by gender. The men attend the signing of the ketubah, marriage contract, which needs signatures of 3 witnesses close to the family recognized as Torah (bible) scholars, a guarantor who will cover expenses if necessary and the groom.  Once the ketubah is signed the groom shares a  D’vor Torah (Bible lesson) after which the men have drink and a bite to eat.

The women on the other hand meet and greet the seated bride, her mother and future mother-in-law and her attendants in this case, her sister and future sister–in-law.  During this female reception line, the Bride not only receives the guest’s best wishes but she also bestows a blessing on each guest. It was very touching and sweet.  There is also wine and the same h’ors d’oeuvres as the men.  A fiddler played traditional music as he wandered between the two rooms and the women also had  piano music.

The couple have not seen each other for an entire week before the day so the groom’s anticipation is great as the men eventually enter the women’s room staying apart from the women but to observe the bedecking  (when the Bride is veiled by the groom) after which each father bestows a blessing upon the  Bride. 
                                                 

Future Father in law giving blessing

Father of the bride blessing

Moms securing the veil 

(L to R) Bride's  Father , Groom, Groom's Father, Rabbi 

Now it’s finally time for the  Chupah ( wedding canopy). Natureman insists the Chabad always hold their weddings outside and sure enough out we went on a 25 degree breezy Spring day. Brrr. 

 During the half an hour plus canopy service, the veiled bride circled the groom 7 times after which she was unveiled, there was wine and seven blessings recited as thanks is given to the Almighty.  (Add'l notes and link below.)


The final tradition was the breaking of the glass by the groom’s stomp. The Rabbi proclaimed the last time the groom would be able to put his foot down. ( Jewish humor?)  Everybody shouted ''Mazel Tov'' and we all proceeded back into the warm building for dinner and dancing.

Family pictures were taken as guests picked up their table cards with 'co-ed' table seating arrangements and begun their dinner courses while being entertained by a Jewish rock band. (The Newlyweds disappeared to consummate the marriage.)  

Upon their return a big hoopla announced the  Wedding Couple and then once again genders separate into dancing areas separated by a mehitzah, a cloth screen.  I have to admit the ruckus on the guys's side was definitely louder.  

The wedding couple tease each other over the mehitza (photo by Sherry)

As the groom confessed the next morning his friends and family pulled out all the traditions, dancing with him on their shoulders friends  lifting him up on a chair and table, jumping rope and even throwing him up in a table cloth.  

The women followed suit with the chair and table raising but not the table cloth. Tied together napkins served as a jump rope. Both groups engaged in frenzied dancing until the main course was announced. The betrothed barely ate  before well wishers joined them for photos. And then it was time for a video  before more dancing and guests  entertaining the wedding couple. Besides guests dancing, rolls're juggled, bottles balanced and a fire show. 

It was such a joyous simcha (celebration) and where I usually last until the party is over, 7 hours did me in and we called it a night. I slept very well after my first Chabad wedding...

The Happy Newlyweds

There is no doubt it was a memorable day for the Newlyweds as well and their parties albeit a bit calmer will continue for the next week. Wishes for many, many happy years together... bis ein und zwansig ! Hugs.

* Circling seven times signifies Joshua circling 7 x around Jericho until the walls came tumbling down and so the bride walks around the groom so that the 'walls between them will fall and their souls will be united.'
* LInk:Seven Blessings